How to Tell if Your Boyfriend is Settling For You?

how to tell if your boyfriend is settling for you

When your boyfriend is settling for you, this can trigger all your insecurities and fears in your relationship. Even if your boyfriend is with you, he’s not entirely invested in you – and you can feel this every day. 

Nobody wants to be with someone who senses that their partner is settling for them, even if they’re not doing necessarily substandard in the relationship. 

You deserve to be with someone who knows your worth when they’re with you. 

In this article, we’ll be discussing everything you need to know about your boyfriend settling for you.

Why Do Men Settle?

One of the most common reasons why men settle is because of their fear of confrontation. 

They’d rather repress their feelings and thoughts rather than deal with the fact that their relationship doesn’t live up to their expectations and standards. 

Another reason men could be settling is the peer pressure to be in a relationship, even when the person they’re with isn’t compatible or proper for them. 

Since everyone in their lives has a significant relationship or they’ve reached a certain age, that pressures them to be in one, even for the wrong reasons. 

They choose to settle instead of waiting for the right person to come into their lives. 

Lastly, men could also settle because of how intense their insecurities are. 

They continuously second-guess themselves and their capabilities, which leads to satisfying for an average woman, rather than going after the woman of their dreams. 

Men will feel, in their gut, they’ll never be good enough for the kind of woman they actually want, so they end up settling instead.

Is Settling in a Relationship Bad?

There’s nothing good about setting in a relationship, especially as you’ll constantly be stuck thinking that you can do better. 

The moment you settle for something less, you’ll never achieve true happiness and contentment. 

You’ll always be wondering all the what-ifs on the chances that you didn’t satisfy. 

Not only are you constantly compromising your own needs and wants for the other person. But your relationship won’t work out, no matter how long you prolong the length of your relationship. 

Setting for fewer means you won’t be happy. This will negatively affect your relationship, which is something you and your partner don’t deserve. 

Most importantly, the longer you settle, the more likely you won’t meet the person actually meant for you in this lifetime. 

You’re one step closer to being in the right relationship if you could just decide on refusing to settle.

Signs a Guy is Settling For You

1. He is Not Himself

A guy is settling for a relationship when he can’t be himself around you. Whether that’s walking on eggshells or not spending time doing the things he loves because of you. 

He’s settling for less when you see that his level of comfort is compromised when he’s around you.

2. He is Staying Because of Your Potential

It’s easy to fall in love with potential all the time, whether intentionally or unintentionally. 

If he tries to constantly change or control your behavior to become someone you just aren’t, he might have fallen in love with you for your potential. 

Everyone has flaws, and if he’s really in love with you, he should have accepted your weaknesses from the start. 

He can inspire you to grow, but if he pushes you to change most of the time, he’s definitely just settling for you.

3. He is Not Reciprocating Your Efforts

Men who are in love with you might not be flowery with their words, but you’ll know through their actions. 

When they reciprocate your efforts, and you don’t like it’s a one-sided relationship, the guy you’re with is into you. 

However, suppose he shows the opposite and doesn’t exert significant effort in the relationship to show how invested he is. 

In that case, it can be a sign that he’s settling for you. 

Even when he does show the effort, his effort is often half-assed or forced, and he’d make you feel this. 

Any working relationship should be about give-and-take, so if you’re the only one constantly giving, he might be settling for the connection.

4. He Doesn’t Give You His Time

Quality time is one of the significant signs that someone loves you as it can never amount to the number of gifts he buys for you. 

With this being said, if he doesn’t give you the time of day and if you have to demand it from him, then your relationship isn’t as substantial as you think. 

You can be sure that he’s settling when he’s not sacrificing even a portion of his time to spend it with you. 

Even when he does, it’s often the hours when he has nothing better to do or doesn’t have notable plans.

5. He is Apathetic and Distant

While guys are known to be distant and unattached, it’s quite different when a guy is genuinely in love with you. 

Even if it isn’t second nature for them, a guy who’s into you will let you in and destroy their walls for you. 

When a guy is just settling for you, however, he will become apathetic towards you. 

It’s his worst nightmare to let a woman in and let down his walls when they’re just settling for someone. 

They can even use the physical connection as a coping mechanism so you won’t notice his lack of emotional and mental connection with you.

Takeaway

In conclusion, I hope this article was able to shed insight into everything you needed to know about a guy settling for you in a relationship. 

It’s one of the worst feelings in the world when someone you really like isn’t satisfied with you. However, you deserve more than a half-assed relationship. 

You deserve to be with someone that when they’re with you, they feel like the luckiest person in the world to love and be loved by you.