Most women have a fantasy about their dream guy, wedding, and family. However, the older you get, the harder it becomes for you to have successful relationships mature into lifelong companionship.
Some say it is bad luck with men; others say it is a spell – you have heard it all.
The truth is failure to have the perfect partner, no matter how hard you try, all lies in your understanding of men’s psychology.
Maintaining a good relationship will be easier once you comprehend how to act on dates, red flags to watch out for, and what you do wrong.
If you have been having a series of bad dates and need to catch a break, this post is for you.
It will help you understand how to keep dating after failure and the pitfalls to avoid.
The Psychology of Failed Dates
Not all relationships you get into will result in a marriage or lifelong partnership. Most dating books and blogs overlook crucial steps when showing you how to find Mr. Right.
To achieve dating success;
- You should know what you want in a relationship and a partner
- Find probable partners
- Gauge their ability to be a match
- Date them to see if you are compatible
Ignoring the four steps mentioned above is setting yourself up for failure.
Attracting a man and going straight to dating them is hopeless if both of you don’t know your needs for companionship.
One huge mistake most women make is communicating their needs after they start seeing a man.
You should know that a man has the potential to be the right partner before committing to them.
Otherwise, you will keep asking yourself if your luck with men will ever change.
Why am I Bad at Dating Men?
Single women looking for love forget to check their internal, stubborn patterns that put off men or cause them to self-sabotage.
If you feel bad at dating men, reflect on these routines because there are high chances that dating has been a fiasco for you.
Some females have defenses caused by past heartaches and disappointments; others have trauma that attracts unhealthy relationships with men.
Furthermore, others are either scared of being intimate, fear competition from other women, or are too picky, causing them to lack a suitable companion.
In addition, some women keep dating rules that are determined by their dating pasts.
If you own a list of strict rules or copy what other women do, your relations will keep being dissatisfying.
Instead, always review and change such practices to break the “always single” cycle.
Other personal issues that make you unattached are low self-esteem, being very judgmental, routine isolation that makes you comfortable being single and having a closed mind.
You should always stay open when you start seeing someone.
Yes, you may get hurt, but isn’t it better to take a risk and find love rather than not trying at all?
You could be fishing in the wrong pond, so getting out of your comfort zone, and identifying and working on your weaknesses are the initial steps to stop sucking so much at dating.
Stop Wasting Your Time on the Wrong Men!
Sometimes, you could be doing everything right, but the man you are dating is not.
Eventually, your courtship will prove futile, and you’ll be back where you started.
Have you ever noticed that when you get an average, nice guy, for some reason, you find yourself pining for a man that is unattainable or damaged?
Women love a man who has some sort of problem or challenge, usually emotional.
Ladies try their best to put in the legwork, make a man realize how great she is, and change his unhealthy patterns for the sake of their love.
Sadly, this change rarely ever comes.
Being occupied with such a man either in fear of being alone or hoping for a better him will only hurt you and waste your time.
All the wasted time you spend trying to change Mr. Wrong could be better used to find Mr. Right.
You should avoid saying no to “nice guys.” As an alternative, try going out with a man that treats you right and appreciates you.
Even if you have low compatibility, it will boost your confidence and give you a perspective of how a successful companionship should feel.
How Do You Keep Dating After Failure?
Now that you know what causes terrible and short-lived relationships and how to avoid them get yourself together and put yourself out there!
But it is not easy, and a lot of young and middle-aged women give up.
Of course, you cannot blame them because nobody wants to expose themselves to vulnerability and heartbreaks.
But, with these dating rules and tips, you will be on your way to finding Mr. Right.
1. Try Dating More Than One Person Simultaneously
Before you commit yourself to a monogamous relationship, feel free to explore your options.
Because, when you meet someone and like them on the first date, things tend to escalate.
Then, you will expect too much from the man.
When they pull away and tell you they were not looking for something serious, you will get hurt, move on to the next guy, and the process repeats itself.
2. Give a Man Up to Two Weeks to Reach Out After a Date
Traditionally, women expected a text within the first seventy-two hours after a date.
However, the man may need more time to know if both of you are compatible and if he wants to see you again.
Unless a man has a good reason why he didn’t get back to you within two weeks, it means they are not interested.
Pursuing them afterward is thus, useless.
3. Give it Time Before Getting Intimate (Sexually)
Women quickly get attached to men. If he treats you perfectly on the first date, avoid having sex with him immediately, as sex may be the only reason he is so lovely and caring.
First-dates sex is not nasty.
Nevertheless, you should give it time to see if the man’s actions, intentions, and words align with what you want.
4. Try Planning Some Dates Yourself
When you give the man the chance to plan every date
- He might ruin it if he’s a lousy planner
- He might feel too pressured
- He might not know what you like
If you make it past the second date, try lifting some weight off his shoulders and organize some dates. It will give them a better understanding of you.
Is it Bad to Give Up on Dating?
Giving up is normal, and you should not feel bad about it.
It is not bad or wrong, but it is best if you don’t. Whenever you are overwhelmed, take a break, reconsider your approach, and dive back in!
Learning from every unsuccessful relationship is essential as it makes you better and wiser.
Finding a partner can take a long while, but do not give up after several slipups.
The fulfillment and happiness you will get after finding love are undoubtedly worth the effort and pain. Dating failure does not mean you are a disappointment.
It simply means you need a few pointers and some encouragement. Both of which this post delivers.
How Women Should Behave on Dates
Dates are the foundation of many relationships, but the first dates are the worst!
If you make an excellent first impression, your date will want to see you again, and again – before you know it, you are shopping for wedding dresses and sending invites.
How should a woman behave on a date to make a man desire her more and develop feelings for her?
Men want an open woman. Be yourself and be straightforward about what you like.
A date is not an interview, therefore, engage, but do not ask too many questions.
Also, avoid dominating the conversation; give them time to talk and encourage their passions and dreams.
Most importantly, do not get too drunk, as your words and actions may get out of hand.
Lastly, avoid talking about past heartbreaks and exes, self-doubt, or timidity. When a man detects any insecurity in you, he will get dodgy and eventually stop seeing you.
Always be on your best behavior when on a date. It might just be the last chance to impress your date.
Are you Ready to Find Mr. Right? And Start Dating Again After Failure?
You are only ready to start dating after a failure if you have dealt with your weaknesses, insecurities, heartbreak, and fears.
When you do so, avoid the wrong guys and go on as many dates as necessary till you find the right one.
This guide can do so much to help you find a compatible partner. You need to put in the effort, think critically, and stay assertive and open-minded.
Life is too short to be with a man who doesn’t understand you, so always have a thorough vetting process before committing.
Searching for Mr. Right should be your journey – not with your friends or family -just you!
Don’t be shy if you are interested in a guy and he’s not making the first move.
The worst-case scenario is him turning you down, which is his loss after all.
