You’re a modern single woman. You are well educated, earn a high salary and have visited three continents. You’re a high-class woman and lowering your standards is a no-no.
You want to find love. But, not any man will please you. You want an amazing man. Because you know your value, you set high standards for the man of your dreams.
You tell yourself, the guy right for you makes six figures, owns his home, and doesn’t have kids.
Any man that falls short of this standard is viewed as unattractive and not given a fair chance with you.
Big mistake.
You have been approached by some great guys both online and in real life. But none of them met your standard. And as a result, you have spent the last three years single and alone.
Here is the saddest part, you actually think it is better to be single and alone rather than lowering your standards for a man that is right for you.
You believe the lie that compromising your standards is settling for a man that will not fulfill you.
Somehow, you equate lower standards to accepting men beneath you or men who won’t value who you are.
In this article, I will show you what lowering your standards means, whether you should lower your standards, how to lower your standards if you need to and whether reducing your criteria will help you find love.
What Does Lowering Your Standards Mean?
When most women hear someone say “lower your standards,” many women believe they have to settle for a low-value guy. The kind of guy that treats women poor works a blue-collar job and doesn’t travel.
Yet, this couldn’t be further from the truth.
Believe it or not. There are excellent men everywhere that will value a woman like you. The key to finding them is being open to dating a guy that isn’t your type.
Lowering your standards means you are open to dating different types of men and having new experiences.
When you are willing to share new experiences with men that you wouldn’t usually date. You learn more about yourself and the qualities you will want in a mate.
When you lower your standards, you expand the number of men that you’re open to dating.
People often say that dating is a numbers game. If that is true, then why not be available to date as many men as possible.
Should You Lower Your Standards for a Man?
Many dating and relationship gurus will tell you to have high standards for yourself and never lower your values to get a man.
Yet, many of these women struggle to find a man that meets their high standards. You are standardizing yourself out of the dating game.
You should lower your standards if you require so much from a man that you can’t find a man.
Suppose you had a list of requirements for a guy that consisted of the following. A guy must be age 30 to 45, financially stable, no children, 5’10 or taller, no hookups or flings, non-smoker, anti-sugar, must pay on the first date, social drinker, must love animals, can’t be self-centered, can’t own a dog from a breeder…etc.
Lower your standards if you have unrealistic expectations of what a man is. Women often believe that their man is supposed to act like one of their girlfriends.
Your man will not be in tune with your emotions, and he will not want to talk things out when dealing with an issue.
Men will provide and protect you. Expect a man to want to feel like he is responsible for your happiness. This will make guys feel like your hero.
Look for your man to want to listen to your issues only to solve the problem. Again this makes him feel like your hero.
You should lower your standards if you are dating a guy with marriage potential.
Suppose you met a great guy. He values your opinion. He treats you with respect, and he has a great sense of humor. He plans dates for you, and he made his intentions clear that he is looking for a wife.
However, you’re hesitant to entirely fall in love with this guy because he does meet all your standards. He doesn’t have a high-paying job, isn’t well-traveled, and you’re the same height as him.
Other than those qualities, he’s a great catch. If you’re hesitant to commit to a great guy because he doesn’t meet all your expectations. You should compromise your standards.
How Do You Lower Your Standards?
Set realistic standards for yourself. When you are setting practical standards, it requires you to be honest with yourself.
It’s OK to want a man that earns a high salary, but how realistic is that standard for a guy if you don’t make a high salary yourself?
A man that earns a high salary, like a doctor, actor, or athlete, has many options. There are hundreds of women that want them, and these men know it.
To gain the attention of these high earners, you have to separate yourself from the other thousands of women that want them to. Being pretty isn’t enough.
The chances that you can stand out are slim.
What I want you to understand is that whatever you require from a guy, a man will require equal or more value from you.
Suppose you require a man who provides for all your needs, then a man like this will require a submissive woman.
In other words, what you require from a man, you must be willing to give a guy what he desires as well.
Understand what your actual needs are in a relationship. A lot of people often have wants as requirements in a relationship and not needs.
Needs are things you require that make a relationship last, like honesty, trustworthiness, and being fun.
Suppose you don’t know what your needs are for a relationship. The best thing you can do is to date different types of men.
As you are dating, evaluate these guys based on their characteristics. Over time you will start to see the qualities you need in a relationship based on the men you’ve dated.
Do Lowering Your Standards Help?
Some women have a rigid list of requirements a man must meet before going on a date with the guy. Lowering your standards to fit reality can help.
As stated before, if you lower your standards and are open to dating different types of men, you increase the number of guys available to you.
Therefore, increasing your odds of finding a man that will value, honor, and respect you.
The purpose of lowering your standards is to rid yourself of unrealistic ideals of what you think the man of your dreams is like. And realizing that no man is perfect. We all have flaws.
You are better off opening yourself to dating as many men as you can. That is the best way to know the qualities that really matter to you in a relationship.
